My travails

All of my life I’ve had trouble figuring out what I wanted. When people would ask me what I wanted to be in life, I never could answer. “What do you want to be when you grow up?” I never knew. One of the blessings of being old is that I don’t have to know the answer to that now. But I am a constant source of aggravation when people ask me an opinion about something and I’m undecided.

I really lucked out with my life. My wife has been a wonderful partner. I had a good career as a planner even though I’ve never liked planning. There may be an earlier post about that. I spent years wondering “What the hell is a planner”. And what is a plan? I guess I alwats knew, but thought that the whole process was stupid.

Now I can’t figure out what kind of car I want! Nor can I decide how old a avehicle, how much I want to spend, or how many miles I can live with. Or the fuel mileage I should insist on. My 2014 Chrysler Town and Country minivan is on its last legs, and I really need to replace it before it dies. But with what? People ask “What are you looking for?” and I don’t know how to answer. Sometimes I want another van. Sometimes a small car. I had the hots for a 2019 Build for about a day and a half.

I could get an electric car, but then I’d have to spend $1,700 or so putting in a Level 2 charger. Maybe I should go with an SUV or crossover, even though I’ve never used to like them much. I test drove a GMC Terrain, and I’ve really never liked the looks of them! But I was at the dealership checking out a 2019 Buick Lacrosse, so I thought what the hell, why not?

I want a heated steering wheel. And good luck finding that feature in a used car search tool! I want adaptive cruise control. Also a sunroof. And comfortable armrests for my left and right arm. The left arm can be an issue. A lot of cars, when you put the seat way back, don’t give you a place for your left arm!

I should keep typing out my thoughts on the matter to help me decide just what to look for. I like those Cadillac CTS-4 cars. But they aren’t much for hauling! At least with the Buick Lacrosse the rear seats fold down and the area can be reached from the trunk.

Trevor thinks I should get a Q3, small SUV. Too small. Now I’m thinking VW Tiguan, Toyota Rav4, Lincoln Corsair. Stay tuned!

I’m good

I don’t know what that pain was last May. It hurt like hell, then it didn’t. I’m good now. Marcia is good too.

Our bathroom was recently completed. We turned our one awesome tile bathroom into a full bath and a half a bath. Now we can both go at the same time without having to go down the basement.

It was crazy expensive, but it’s all done and looks nice. Now for a carport.

Lois Update

My friend and former Fitchburg Public Library Reference Librarian Lois has moved to Fort Worth Texas to be closer to her niece. The trip was made in a specially equipped Sprinter van that drove straight from Fitchburg to Texas, stopping only for meals. According to Sylvia, it was a pretty gruesome trip. I guess all three of the staff were upset and angry, and Lois was quite uncomfortable.

But I guess all’s well that ends well. She seems happy in her new place. Lois had fallen at the Gables and broke a bone in her ankle, so was sent to rehab at the Highlands. She was interviewed and examined by the Gables, who said they wouldn’t let her back because she needed too much care. So, she was moved into a tiny room on the 2nd floor of the Highlands, sharing a room with a 102 year old woman, who never made a peep and was always asleep, so I guess she was an ideal roommate!

But every time I went to visit her, she told me she didn’t like being there, so Sylvia found a place near her in Texas. I’m going to miss her, but I’m glad she is more comfortable there.

Getting old, I guess

Marcia has been battling pneumonia, I’ve got something that is causing intense pain in my right leg, and Lois is at The Highlands.

Marcia thinks she caught a cold that led to pneumonia when she was in the hospital for her SVT thing where her heart races. They kept her overnight because she had some sort of elevated enzyme. Or something. It cleared up right away, and she was discharged the next day, March 18. But a few days later she caught a bad cold, and then pneumonia. She’s still coughing 62 days later! But thank God she’s a lot better because….

I had a lower back pain come on at least two weeks ago. I kept thinking it would get better, but last night (May 17, 2025) it became agonizing. I have never been in so much pain, tossing and turning and unable to get comfortable.

I went to urgent care this morning, and they said to go to the hospital. So I did. They checked my urine, took a CT scan, and didn’t find anything. They loaded me up with prescriptions including gabapentin, morphine, lidocaine patch, and valium. We’ll see. My back hurts as of this writing.

And as a result I didn’t go see Lois today. I’ve been going to the Highlands to see her most days. Lately I’ve been sticking one of Marcia’s airpods in her ear and playing music. She can’t hear for shit, so we don’t really talk much. I’m afraid she is nearing the end of her days. Me too.

It just got resurrected!

The site was hosed for months, but my hosting provider helped me unlock it and make it work again. It’s not like I use it a lot, but I do have a history here going back to 2008, back in more (less?) halcyon days.

And then they gave me a quote for a renewal of $740 for three years, so I balked, and they lowered the price twice, finally down to just under $600, which was still too much. So I said bye and am trying to move everything to this Hostinger site.

They gave me a free domain for a year, so I thought I’d get davidjstreb.com and aim this blog at it. I’ve been waiting for YEARS to get davidstreb.com, but apparently someone has it, even though they aren’t really using it. At the end of the year I’ll have to pony up $22 or so to keep davidjstreb.com.

My startlogic stuff is set to disappear at the end of the month. I have rudimentary websites there for Fitchburg Civic Days, First Parish Church, Route 43 Antique Shop, Partner’s Pub, Fitchburg Farmer’s Market, Fitchburg Library (Sharon, the previous director, wanted to set up a mobile site so I was playing around with something years back), straight2hadestrivia.com (which I could never get the folks at River Styx to adopt, even though I bought two different domains for them!), and twincitiestrail.com.

Actually, I believe First Parish Church is live! Lame, but live! They have another site, but someone has the get Wil to pass on the authentication code to access it. So until they can access it and update it, fitchburguu.com and .org points to startlogic.

Anyway, it’s all going away in two weeks. I hope I learn more about hostinger. Their help chat replies promptly, but it seems to be canned responses. Like it’s AI or something. Anyhow, today was good, in that I was able to get the rudiments of the blog up (that’s this) and the old brewers festival site, which has a lot of history.

Wussup?

I’m 72 going on 73. Life is good as far as I’m aware. I’ve kept my weight (barely) below 200. I eat well because of Marcia. Salads and stuff. I drank a lot tonight, but I try to minimize my drinking. I’ve been cutting my bread in half for breakfast toast. I still eat cereal on occasion – shredded wheat & bran, grape nuts, wheat Chex.

I’m staying up late (post 9:45) to watch the Cleveland Guardians. On local TV they’re playing the Dodgers, which is who they’re playing when I go to spring training in March with family.

I saw Lisa Wong at the Madonna of the Holy Rosary fish fry last Friday. I said hello. She has two young children. I tried to be nice, but I find myself increasingly resentful for what she did to me. yes, I know I am enjoying my life but I would enjoy it more with a little more money that I could have gotten from my pension had I worked longer.

I’m wrestling with whether to swap recliners with jon. I have a heavy wooden recliner, but think I might want something smaller and more comfortable.

My Friend Lois

Lois is a friend who lives in the Gables here in Fitchburg. I met her when she was Marcia’s boss. I always thought she was a good looking gal, and I loved her hair. Lois doesn’t have local family. She grew up in Nebraska but went away to the big city – New York City – to work in a library there. She got mugged while there and spent some time in the hospital. While recuperating, she learned that her mother was sick with colon cancer, so she returned to Nebraska to care for her mother. She found a library job at Kearney State College in Nebraska. After her father died in 1973, she realized she wanted to return to the east coast.

In Lois’ words she “wanted to return East and a friend sent me a NYTimes ad for the FPL position.  I saw that the Director was from Brooklyn. I called and was told that Mr. Kissner would be happy to interview me if I could get there ASAP.   It worked out, and I started work in December 1973. ” Art Kissner was the director of the Fitchburg Public Library when Marcia started working there in November of 1983. And that’s how I met Lois.

I offered to help her out at some point a number of years back when she needed a ride. And then, early on Veteran’s Day in 2016, she fell getting out of bed, crawled to the wall phone, and inexplicably called us instead of 911 for help.

Lois had given us her key and some papers in case anything should happen to her a few days earlier, which I thought at the time was touching, as we were clearly an important contact to her. Marcia and I drove over with our key that morning but couldn’t get in because of the security chain on the door, so I had to borrow a bolt cutter from the office. Marcia went in to help and I kept a discrete distance to preserve some semblance of modesty. The upshot was a week in the hospital and 30 days at the Golden Living Center. Nothing golden about that, believe me!

I spent the next 30 days going to Lois’ apartment almost every day to fetch her Boston Globe and mail, and to write out checks for her to pay bills – stuff like that. Lois’ niece in Texas, Sylvia, helped direct the issues involved, but she could only do so much remotely. Everyone realized that Lois couldn’t live alone in her apartment safely, so they researched assisted living places remotely.

Lois had apparently been having cognitive issues, and one of her doctors felt that she was developing dementia, which given my continuing experience with her is ludicrous and alarming when I think about how that could have impacted the rest of her life. Sylvia got information about Manor on the Hill because it has a memory care unit, and they felt Lois could transition into it if need be. I went to check it out and talked to the people there. Then I stopped at The Gables on the way home to talk to them.

From what I saw, if I had my druthers, I’d take The Gables. And that’s what I told Sylvia. Fortunately, she agreed. The Gables has been awesome. The rooms are like apartments, which made vacating Lois’ apartment for which she was still paying rent much less of a challenge. And the food at the Gables is fabulous. They said at the time that they can deal with some memory impairment, but that certainly hasn’t been an issue with Lois.

Marcia took Lois to the doctor where she was evaluated, and Marcia said Lois couldn’t draw numbers on a clock face. So I don’t blame the doctors. But it’s a lesson for me that just because a person is 87 doesn’t mean that their dementia isn’t temporary and that it might be caused by a Urinary Tract Infection or a c diff infection.

She was having trouble with her emails during the pandemic, and I couldn’t get in to help her. It’s better now at this writing, but she doesn’t seem to need much help any more. She’s still using Windows 8 and a crazy Microsoft roller ball mouse, and still reading (and replying) to her emails every day as of this writing! (July, 2022)

Me

I go to sleep easily at night in bed, but can’t sleep on a plane. Perhaps it’s the sitting.

How the freak did I get an erectile dysfunction ad here?

I can’t think of anything else.

I just heard

In Louisiana they recently tried to pass a medical marijuana law that only allowed taking cannabis as a rectal suppository. It failed by one vote.

I went on a fishing trip with a few friends in southern Louisiana – Cypremort Point. A friend of one of my fishing friends is from there. He told me that.

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A stranger area you’ve never seen.

Update

Let’s get some of those Afghani’s in here to work as line cooks, bartenders, wait staff etc. they want to work, and we need them!

We make our own problems!

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Nice that the Moderna’s working so well. So far, so good!